Best friends for life

Seniors+Ellie+Davis+and+Isabelle+Downey+recreate+a+photo+from+2006.

Photos courtesy of Ms. Davis.

Seniors Ellie Davis and Isabelle Downey recreate a photo from 2006.

As an eighth grader heading into high school, students hear many unsettling rumors that seem to be widely accepted: Everyone seems to agree that you will not leave high school with the same friends you entered with. Students are reminded this all throughout eighth grade, at Freshman Day, during FOG, and any other time it fits into a conversation. Despite the repetition of this idea, it is still necessary to question why the loss of childhood friendships seems to be guaranteed.

Studies exploring the stability of teen friendships tend to support this common rumor that childhood friendships will end before you leave high school.

Florida Atlantic University conducted a study on friendship among adolescents and found that only one percent of friendships lasted for the full five years of the study. This means that only four of the 401 people in the study remained friends for over five years.

When these statistics are applied to the York student population, it claims that only 26 of the 2,643 students will keep their life long best friend for all four years of high school.

Despite the evidence from those 401 adolescents predicting the end of many childhood friendships in high school, we found that York students counter these statistics. There are countless seniors at York who have remained best friends since elementary school, pre-school, or even earlier. Interviews with those seniors revealed that there are some very strong friendships at York, leading us to believe that life long friendship since childhood is, in fact, very possible.

Research also shows that long-lasting adolescent friendships come with many benefits for those involved. Entering high school with your childhood best friend reduces anxiety, and friendships are crucial for a child’s development.

A study by the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development reported that teens at about fifteen to sixteen years old will have lower levels of anxiety and depression at the age of 25 if they have a close friend rather than  a big group of friends in high school. Teens who have a few close friends will ultimately have better mental health than those who were considered popular having large friend group in high school.

Those mental health benefits and more begin early in life. According to research by the University of Florida Department of Family, Youth, and Community Sciences, a best friend can help children learn social skills, how to control their emotions, and how to respond to the emotions of others. They will overall be better at communicating when it comes to working with others, dealing with emotions, and solving problems. This can benefit them in school, work, relationships, and anything else a child will deal with in their future.

Overall, York students do seem to have very strong long-term friendships and will most likely experience all the benefits that come with them. Interviews with some of the many seniors who have been lifelong friends reveal how they have remained friends for so long and what makes their bond unbreakable.

Sarah Pinkowski and Nicki Anderson

Photo courtesy of Ms. Anderson.
Seniors Nicki Anderson and Sarah Pinkowski in 2007.

Seniors Sarah Pinkowski and Nicki Anderson became friends in AYSO soccer in first grade, reconnected in eighth grade, and have been inseparable ever since. They see each other as sisters and treat each other like family. Sarah and Nicki are extremely comfortable around each other. They can always be themselves and make each other smile.

Photo courtesy Ms. Anderson.
Seniors Nicki Anderson and Sarah Pinkowski in 2019.

“Nicki is easily the funniest person I’ve met in my entire life,” Pinkowski said. “No matter how bad of a day I could be having, I can always count on her to have me rolling on the floor belly laughing in a matter of minutes of her opening her mouth.”

 

 

Elysia Woodward and Jacob Wit

Photo courtesy of Ms. Woodward.
Seniors Elysia Woodward and Jacob Wit in 2006.

For their first day of kindergarten, seniors Elysia Woodward and Jacob Wit were sat next to each other and immediately clicked. Their personalities balance each other out, and they continue to support each other and keep the other in line.

“She listens to what I have to say, no matter how dumb it is, and she’s always honest in her response,” Wit said. “She isn’t afraid to call me out on something. I think that’s important in a friend.”

Photo courtesy of Ms. Woodward.
Seniors Elysia Woodward and Jacob Wit in 2018.

 

Through their close families and common interests, they have remained best friends throughout elementary school, middle school, and high school. Being a boy-girl friendship, they have had to resist social pressure to date, but they would never want to compromise their friendship. They rely on each other and value their friendship over everything.

 

“He is loyal. No matter what the issue is, he will always be by your side to help you in whichever way he can,” Woodward said. “I can call him up, tell him whatever I need to let out, and he will help me find a way to solve the problem without hanging up on me.”

 

Savannah Mallon and Samantha Kao

Photo courtesy of Ms. Kao.
Seniors Savannah Mallon and Sam Kao in 2008.

Seniors Savannah Mallon and Samantha Kao have built their friendship off of honesty, humor, and unconditional loyalty. Savannah and Sam have been friends so long that they pretty much know what the other is thinking and can call each other out if they aren’t being genuine. Despite any difficulties, they always have each others backs.

“She’s perfect in general, but her ability to accept the weird and horrible parts of myself is one of the reasons I love her so much,” Mallon said. “I’m not an easy person to get along with and she takes all of my faults and just rolls with them.”

They have the same interests despite having different personalities. They credit each other for all of their best memories and build more every time they are together. They can spend unlimited time together and never have a dull moment. Savannah and Sam love spending time together and Savannah always goes to Sam’s house to eat.

Photo courtesy of Ms. Kao.
Seniors Savannah Mallon and Sam Kao in 2019.

 

“Sometimes we do the dishes together at my house. We empty and load my dishwasher and it actually takes an hour because we get side tracked and end up on the floor laughing. This has happened on multiple occasions,” Kao said.

 

John Milling, Jack Condon, and Aidan Gaughan

Photo courtesy of Ms. Gaughan.
Seniors John Milling, Jack Condon, and Aidan Gaughan in 2006.

Seniors John Milling, Jack Condon, and Aidan Gaughan go way back, back to 2 years old and even earlier.

“Jack and I have been neighbors since we were about 2 and we have been friends ever since.,” Milling said. “Aidan is my cousin so my mom and his mom are sisters so we did everything growing up together.”

Being friends for that long can have its ups and downs, but for these three boys, it was primarily ups considering when they fight with each other, it does not last very long and it is a clean fight and resolution.

Photo courtesy of Ms. Gaughan.
Seniors John Milling, Jack Condon, and Aidan Gaughan in 2019.

 

“When we get into fights, they tend to just resolve over time,” Condon said.

Sometimes it is hard for friendships to last this long, a variety of things can happen to the friends to make the lifespan of the friendship much shorter, but not for this triad.

“We’ve never really gotten sick of each other,” Gaughan said. “We always something fun to do.”

 

 

Delaney Tase and Annika Tourlas

Photo courtesy of Ms. Tourlas.
Seniors Delaney Tase and Annika Tourlas in 2008.

At the age of three, senior Delaney Tase moved here from Florida. Her coat hook in preschool was right next to Annika Tourlas, and they became best friends. Their families have also joined the friendship and they have become one big combined family. They are basically sisters and are there for each other no matter what.

“We have been there for each other through medical worries, college stress, losing friends, and anything you can think of,” Tourlas said. “She is my rock and the person I can go to when I feel like my world is crumbling down.”

Photo courtesy of Ms. Tourlas.
Seniors Delaney Tase and Annika Tourlas in 2019.

They do anything together from vacations to music festivals, and their adventures bring them closer together. After the past 15 years, there is nothing that could tear them apart.

 

“There’s a difference between a friend and a best friend, and a friendship with your best friend takes effort,” Tase said. “At the end of the day one friend will always be there for you, and you have to work to keep that friendship strong.”

 

David Hansen and Tristan Contant

Photo courtesy of Ms. Contant.
Seniors Tristan Contant and David Hansen in 2007.

Ever since their first day of kindergarten at Edison Elementary School, seniors David Hansen and Tristan Contant have had a strong friendship and stood together through thick and thin. Their bond even withstood one of the toughest tests of friendship when Tristan’s family moved to Canada.

“This was devastating at first as I was losing my best friend going into 4th grade, but we promised that we would stay in touch and even visit each other,” Hansen said. “Fortunately, when his dad was unhappy with the job in Canada, my dad was able to get his dad a job at the company he worked for, and Tristan moved back to Elmhurst a year later.”

Photo courtesy of Ms. Contant.
Seniors Tristan Contant and David Hansen in 2019.

 

Now, David and Tristan do not take their close proximity for granted. Tristan introduced David to geocaching, and they spend their summers biking for hours to find them. In fact, they have found a total of 100 geocache in thirteen different states and three countries.

Whether its geocaching or writing parody songs, they are always enjoying time together and pushing each other out of their comfort zones.

“David is extroverted and engaging while I am introverted and shy,” Contant said. “David pushed me to try new things and I pull to just relax sometimes.”